Sunday, March 15, 2009

The One Who Stays

I had a conversation with my mother the other day, well more like an uncontrollable bout of verbal diarrhea, but through my musings, venting, sharing I had a thought - a preponderance of truth if you will.
Being cheated on isn't pleasant, in fact it sucks but I believe that each individual gets to choose how they respond to that infidelity/betrayal and should be able to do so without judgement from outside sources. That having been said, the prevailing reaction is to leave. As a matter of fact those who stay are often ridiculed, labeled as weak and stupid - put plain they are judged...harshly.

But make no mistake about it, leaving may be difficult but talk to me about the strength of the one who stays. Unless you've stayed you can't possibly understand the strength that it entails. Waking up beside that person knowing life has forever been altered to before the betrayal and after. Learning how to forgive and trust again. Putting it behind you. Not lashing out when you have emotional swells that hit you like a tidal wave. Lashing out but coming back from the ledge before you jump. Trying to heal from the past hurt while moving on and doing this without the space and distance of a break up...no they are there in your face everyday.
No, I don't doubt the power and strength of leaving but talk to me about the one who stays. That kind of quiet strength is what separates the boys from the men, the women from the girls.

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